The Dating Game Made Easy!

I used to rack my brains pondering away the hours in an attempt to analyze why it is that some guys can make a date with the mere wink of an eye, whereas others just struggle no matter how many books they read on successful dating, or new approaches they try. Let’s face it, some guys just find it impossible to make a lasting first impression. I have realized one important and reassuring fact though, and that is looks are really only skin deep.

I’ve seen some very ordinary looking chaps with absolute beauties on their arm. In fact, some guys are just plain ugly yet have stunning looking partners. Talk about beauty and the beast! I’m certainly no god’s gift to woman, but I’m not a bad looker either, but for some reason, I have always found it impossible to hold onto a date for more than a couple of engagements. That was until one day I decided to step outside of myself in an attempt to look at my dates as an observer. The results I came back with gave me some sure pointers of how NOT to date. Okay, here goes:

Due to nerves I was asking a lot of daft questions. Questions like; are you ok? You seem a little quiet. What’s wrong, don’t you fancy me? And other such insecure and stupid inquiries.

I also realized that I spent about 90% of the date talking about me, me, and more me. Oh how wonderful am I, let me tell you some more about me.

Through my research I realized that the best conversationalists are those that say little and listen a lot. Think about it for a second. How many times has someone listened to you rabbit on and on about something or other without even opening their mouth? You may leave the meeting thinking to yourself what a lovely person they were to chat with, yet they hardly spoke a word.

So, my simple analysis helped me completely change my approach towards dating and it has worked wonders. The first thing I did on a new date was to take the lady to a place where there was activity. Bowling, skating, or a fairground for example. That’s got rid of those uncomfortable quite moments I used to have when conversation ran dry in a silence bar or peaceful restaurant.

Secondly, I get the gal talking about herself. It shows an interest and also means I don’t feel it necessary to put on my invisible clowns outfit and entertain.

Thirdly, I don’t get into heavy conversations about past relationships, and if the lady starts on hers, I’ll nip it in the bud as quickly as possible so we can get back on track with our date, not our past.

Finally, I turn off my mobile phone once we’ve started the date. I used to have this weird idea that if I got a lot of calls during the date (I used to get my buddies to call deliberately), then my date would think I was very popular and therefore like me more. Oh how wrong was I!

Well, that’s my take on the dating game made easy. These are some very simple suggestions but ones that completely changed my attitude and outlook regarding relationships. As a consequence, I no longer need these new found dating skills, as I got on so well with my last date that we’ve become an item. However, I still let the lady do most of the talking, as it keeps the peace if you know what I mean.

About the Author:
Mike South is a proficient writer and webmaster for DatesAllowed dot com where he writes on such issues as the free online dating agency and the adult dating sites. He also has many other Dating related pieces on the site.
Article Submitted On: August 05, 2006
Article Source: Ezine Articles